What If Your Adoption Glass Is Half Empty?

If our adoption glass is half empty, we’ll be growing something in our hearts that is downright malicious. Something unseen and destructive. Something that keeps us from growing and moving toward maturity. Something that keeps us looking at life in a distorted way.

We will fight for our rights to be heard and even become somewhat militaristic. We will make loss our focus and all the while, we will be growing a deep root of bitterness inside, resulting in anger, rage, depression, guilt, and self-loathing. Not a pretty picture or healthy life.


I propose becoming “fair and balanced.” Of course there is loss involved in adoption, but for every loss, there is a gain. The deepest losses should produce the highest gains.

Just for fun, trying reversing the loss issues in your life and see if you can make a list of gains.

You may be pleasantly surprised when you’re done!

And, how I would love it if you shared some gains here (black box way down after verbiage).


4 responses to “What If Your Adoption Glass Is Half Empty?”

  1. 20bet Avatar

    Your article gave me a lot of inspiration, I hope you can explain your point of view in more detail, because I have some doubts, thank you.

  2. Sherrie Eldridge Avatar

    Shefalie….so well put! Obviously, God has given you a song in the night…..and I love hearing your song. Sherrie

  3. Shefalie Avatar

    With my loss……..I have gained deeper understanding and compassion for others. With my loss I have gained wider perspective on the whole of the triad roles and experiences. With my loss………I have gained an appreciation I have a voice and it can be used in a beneficial way. With my loss…..I have gained an ability to sit with others in their pain…and not run away because I have faced my own…..the reality of it……….In my loss…..I have gained a faith……and a saviour……and knowledge of who Jesus is………thank you…….Shefalie

  4. tilford23 Avatar

    I really appreciate the perspective on this to acknowledge the gains that come with loss. Sometimes as an adoptive parent it feels overwhelming to read and process adoption related information that focuses so greatly on the loss. I love the idea of being balanced. In all aspects of life!

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